Moments In Time
by im-yours-for-life
Summary: This will be a continuing story with bits of what I want to see happen in Series 5 but also moments from previous series I might want to see explored, maybe even some AU moments that I wish I had happened. I accept prompts as well, so if there is something you would like to see, please let me know.
1. Chapter 1

This is what I would like to see in the first episode of Series 5. I will put a trigger warning here because I do mention Anna's assault

* * *

Part One

John looked up from his book as Anna finished up her nightly rituals before climbing into bed. She was seated at the vanity braiding her long blonde hair. As he watched her nimble hands work the pale tresses and he got lost in his thoughts as her hands worked quickly to gather all the strands together. It had been over a year and half since Anna's attack and while things would never be exactly as they were, their lives had resumed a normal path again. That's not to say that things were still not difficult at times. Anna would still have a nightmare occasionally. John would wake up to the bed shaking and quickly turn to see Anna struggling against hands he couldn't see. He knew better than to just shake her awake; he had done that the first time he had seen Anna experience a nightmare and Anna had lashed out catching him on the cheek. Once she had awoken she had been wracked with guilt but John assured her all was well and from then on, he would softly whisper her name and touch her gently until her eyes would open. It would always take a few moments for Anna to be aware and the terror John saw in her eyes always made his heart break a little. But then Anna would reach for him and John would take her in his arms, whispering words of safety and love until her breathing would even out and she would be asleep once again. And the nightmares were happening less and less as time went on, and the shadows that used to often be seen on Anna's face were happening with less frequency as well. John still saw them from time to time. Sometimes a loud noise would come from the Downton kitchen and Anna would jump and fear would darken her lovely face or she wouldn't hear John approaching and his voice would make her jump. Anna was always contrite after those moments and quick with an apology, but John wouldn't hear of it. He would always grab her hand or place a kiss on her brow and assure her that she had nothing to be sorry about.

John's guilt was not so quick to be appeased. When Mrs. Hughes had first told him about what happened to his beloved wife, his immediate thoughts had of course been to find his wife and comfort her, to tell her that everything would be okay and that they would be okay. He would never blame her for what happened; he would never see her as less than the kind-hearted, loving and beautiful woman who had captured his heart the moment she had taken his hand over a decade ago. He remembered finding her in that infernal boot room and taking her hand in his before telling her the truth. That he knew what happened. She had been upset thinking that the worst had happened and their marriage would be over, he remembered the relief on her face when he told her he loved her more than ever. It was when he took her in his arms and the sobs wracked her small frame that the anger begin to seep into John's bones, the anger at the man who had hurt his wife. John knew it was Green, even with the denials from Anna and Mrs. Hughes, he knew it was the valet. He began to imagine the ways he could hurt the man, he had learned things in prison, things that would be invaluable in exacting his revenge on Green. Green was a cocky bastard, and it was easy to get him to talk about where he lived and his schedule. A few casual questions here and there and John had a timeline into the daily life of Green and the idea began to really germinate in his mind when Anna mentioned going to London for a few days with Lady Mary. A quick mention of going to York to Mr. Carson and John's plans were set in motion. Of course what happened that day had never been mentioned to Anna and John had to admit that the shame he felt about that day had eaten at his soul. He didn't like that the secret was still between them, but fear had kept him from telling her the truth. But John knew he had to come clean to Anna, tell her all of it, especially now, he didn't want the secret to be between them anymore.

He remembered the day that Lord Gillingham had brought the news of his valet's demise, and Anna's face and her questions about risking everything. He knew she doubted him and he hated that he had put that doubt there. He hadn't told her what happened in the beginning because he didn't want her to be upset by what he had done. However, as the months had passed, John's guilt had grown and now with Anna's recent news he knew he needed to come clean and tell her the truth. He was brought out of his thoughts by his wife settling into the bed, pulling the covers over her. John put the marker in his book, closing it and putting it on to his nightstand before turning back to his wife, opening his arms. Anna quickly slid into them sighing with contentment.

John stroked a hand up and down her arm before running it over the bump that was just starting to show. Anna had told John the news only last week, after he had insisted she talk to Dr. Clarkson after weeks of being sick and tired. John hadn't been able to hide his surprise or his elation. They had never stopped trying to conceive a baby but after a while they had come to terms with the fact that it might not happen and were content with their lives. John admitted he was nervous about being a father in his fifties, but he was excited as well. Anna was glowing of course and had already knitted two sets of booties, blue and pink to cover all the bases. It had been Anna's news last week that had made John realize he needed to come clean with Anna. He didn't want this next chapter of their lives together to be shadowed by his secret. He placed a kiss on her brow, before speaking.

"Anna? I need to tell you something."

Anna looked up and him and frowned at the look of nervousness on his face. She quickly sat up and turned her body towards him, reaching for his hand. "John? What is it?"

John took a deep breath. "It's about the day Green died." John saw the light in her eyes dim and cursed at himself for taking it away, but he knew he had to press on, that he had to tell her the truth once and for all. "As you know, I did go to York that day, but I left very early in the morning and when I got there I bought another ticket, a ticket to London."

John heard her slight gasp and felt her hand tighten in his. He glanced at her before looking down and continued with his story. "I had to wait twenty minutes for the train to arrive so I sat at a bench and thought about the ways I could do it. How I could kill Green-"

Anna cut him off, "John stop, I don't need to hear this. I know-"

"Anna let me finish, please?" He saw her nod from the corner of his eye, and continued, "So I sat there on that bench in York and thought about how to do it, and I was confident I could do it and not be caught, but you know me and you know I sometimes think too much and a little voice inside of me said that I might not get away with it. I tried to push that voice away but it lingered and I began to wonder what would happen if I did get caught. I saw your face the day that I was convicted of murdering Vera, and I heard your scream of horror when the verdict was read. I remembered your face tear-stained and grey that day in the prison when we thought we were saying good-bye. And then I saw your face the day I was released, how happy and relieved you were to have me back." John glanced at Anna then, and noticed the tear escaping her eye. He reached out and removed it with a gentle swipe of his thumb, and then stroked his hand down her face. He took a deep breath.

"I couldn't do it."

Anna let out a sob and threw herself into his arms. John wrapped his arms around her and held her close, tears filling his eyes. He pressed a kiss into her hair before continuing.

"As much as I wanted that man dead Anna, and as much as I wanted to be the one to do it, I couldn't do it. I couldn't hurt you in that way, not again. And I couldn't risk our future. The one you had built for us when you found proof of my innocence and freed me from prison. So I put the ticket in my pocket and spent the day walking in York and I came home that evening, feeling ashamed for even thinking about risking what we had. When you told me Green had been killed, I admit I was happy, but I was also shocked." He looked down at Anna, "I know you wondered if it had been me."

Anna spoke up, "I'm sorry."

John smiled into her hair. "You don't have to be sorry, you had reason to wonder. Hell, I had almost gone there that day to do the exact thing you were worried about. I could hardly be mad at you for thinking that of me. I am only sorry that I let you think it for so long. But I was a coward you see, I was afraid it would change things between us. That you would think of me differently for thinking about it." She heard him hesitate and heard the doubt in his voice, "I was afraid that part of you would be scared of me.."

Anna pulled back from John and and looked deep into his eyes, "You silly beggar, I would never be scared of you. I love you." She smiled as a thought came to her. "Is this why you were so grumpy with me for giving your coat to Mrs. Hughes for the refugees?"

John chuckled, "I wasn't grumpy." He glanced down as Anna giggled, a sound he would never get tired of hearing, "Okay maybe I was a little grumpy. I had forgotten to take the ticket out of my pocket. It was one of the last day I wore that coat, it had gotten too warm for it after that. When you told me that you had given the coat to Mrs. Hughes, I panicked, and was afraid one of you would find the ticket and assume the worst. But when neither of you said anything I assumed the ticket had gone unnoticed. I suppose I should have told you're the truth then, but things were better with us, our lives seemed to be back to normal, yes a new normal, but still normal nonetheless. There was a part of me that knew I should tell you, but I was afraid of ruining what we had rebuilt, so I continued to keep silent. Then you came to me last week and told me the wonderful news." John stopped and shared a smile with Anna. "You told me about the baby and I realized I couldn't keep it from you any longer. I couldn't let this secret follow us any longer."

Anna looked up at John. "I'm glad you told me, and I am glad it isn't between us anymore. I need to share something as well." She saw the confusion in John's eyes and quickly continued, "I was relieved when Lady Mary told me he had been killed. I feel shame for that, but he was a horrible man, and I was scared every time he came back to Downton. I was relieved that I wouldn't feel that fear any longer, I was relieved he couldn't hurt me again. I admit that I did think you had done it, I was afraid you had taken justice into your own hands, but then I realized you wouldn't risk what we had, I had faith in you. And I was right."

John spoke up, "But I thought about it Anna. I thought about risking it all in my anger and guilt for not protecting you."

"Yes, you thought about it, but you're only human John and thinking about it doesn't make you a horrible person. You thought about it but you didn't do it. So you see my faith in you was well-placed."

Tears flowed from John's eyes at Anna's words. "Anna I don't know if I will understand where your faith in me comes from."

Anna reached up and placed a gentle kiss on his lips. "It's easy John. It's called love."

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I hope you all liked this, and I truly hope we find out the truth of what happened in Series 5. As always reviews are always appreciated!


	2. Chapter 2

Just a bit of fluff that takes place after Series 2, Episode 6

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Anna delivered the shocking news about Vera to the rest of the staff at the table and then rose and hurried after John. She found him in their spot of course, the courtyard. He was sitting on a few crates, his head down and his shoulders slumped. Anna walked over and sat on the crates next him placing her hand on his back and rubbing it up and down.

"John it is okay to feel sadness, she may have been a vile woman but she was your wife, and I am sure you had some good times together as well."

John looked over at Anna and shook his head. "It isn't sadness I feel, but relief. And that makes me feel ashamed, for as you said she was a vile woman and she caused me nothing but grief for many years, but a long time ago she was different. I won't lie and say I haven't wished for this very thing, but now that it has happened..." He broke off and looked down again. "Vera's life wasn't easy and it changed her as it changed me. We went in different directions of course, but still she was my wife and I am ashamed that I feel relief at her passing."

"You are a good man, John Bates and Vera put you through hell for many years and I can't find fault with you for being relieved that she can no longer do that."

John sighed. "Maybe you are right. I know I will have to go to London and take care of arrangements and find out the details of her death. I am sure the police know I was there the night she died, and they will have questions for me."

Anna looked at him, fear in her eyes. "Do you think they will suspect you?"

"I don't know, I have my train ticket which shows when I departed London. I don't know if anyone saw me leave the house or saw Vera afterwards. All I know is she was alive when I left and that is what I will tell the police."

"When will you leave?"

"I shall speak with his Lordship tonight and hopefully set out first thing in the morning and be back to Downton by the end of the week."

John placed his arm around Anna and pulled her closer, hugging her to his side. They both looked out into the darkness wondering what tomorrow would bring.

* * *

Anna recognized the tell-tale click of John's cane in the hallway and she had to stop herself from leaping up when he appeared in the entrance way to the Servant's Hall. John smiled as he set his eyes upon her and he was relieved to see the Servant's Hall was empty. He made his way to the chair next to hers and sat down in relief. It had been a long walk in the cold air from the train station and he was happy to be off his feet for a few minutes. He reached for Anna's hand under the table, squeezing it gently.

"I missed you."

Anna smiled at him, "I missed you too. Did everything go well?"

John nodded, "As well as could be expected under the circumstances. Will you be able to get away later? I would like to talk to you, but this is not the right time or place."

Anna nodded, "I have to see to Lady Mary in a few minutes but then I should be free until dinner, so I can meet you in the courtyard in about an hour?

John nodded and was preempted from saying anything else when several housemaids entered the hall.

* * *

Anna found John an hour later, his familiar form standing up and looking out across the courtyard, he turned as he heard her heels and opened his arms to her which Anna willing went into. He held her close for a few moments before placing a kiss on her soft hair. He led her to the crates and holding her hand he told her what had transpired in London.

"Vera was laid to rest yesterday morning after a brief service with just me and the minister and an old friend of hers, Audrey Bartlett.

"And the police?"

"I spoke with them the day I arrived. I told them about our meeting and what it was about. They asked about the cut on my face, I told them the truth. That Vera and slapped me, and cut it open with her ring. That the slap had angered me and I had left before anything else was said or done."

"Do you think they believed you?"

John took a deep breath. "I think so, they believe she committed suicide. There were no outward signs of violence on Vera's body to suspect foul play. And apparently she had been sitting at the table when it happened. She did not leave a note, so they don't have any concrete proof, but right now that is their working theory."

"What does this all mean for us?"

John raised her hand and turning it placed a gentle kiss on the inside of her wrist. "It means I am not a suspect in her death. What it also means my love, is that I am free to court you properly now."

Anna felt the heat on her face as John's lips grazed her wrist once more. She smiled up at him, all the happiness in the world written on her face. "And how do you plan to properly court me, Mr. Bates?"

"The first thing I plan to do is kiss you." With that he lowered his head to capture her mouth with his. The kiss started softly and chaste at first, but Anna opened her mouth slightly and her tongue gently ran across his bottom lip in invitation and John groaned in pleasure and deepened the kiss. Only the need for air separated them and both were breathing heavily and flushed. Anna giggled.

"So that is what proper courting means?"

John smiled, his eyes crinkling in the corners. "You naughty girl, actually what I am hoping is that you will be willing to go on a date with me."

Anna smiled up at him. "Oh that sounds lovely."

John reached down to caress her cheek, "It just so happens that we both have our half days on Friday, so I thought maybe we could make the trip into Ripon, they have a very nice tea shop that would be perfect for lunch and if the weather is not too cold maybe we could even take a stroll through the park?"

Anna threw her arms around him, knocking him back a bit. John threw his arms around her and anchored them against the crates, a chuckle escaping his mouth at her enthusiasm.

Anna turned her head into his neck and sighed happily. "I think it sounds wonderful."

* * *

It had turned out to be an unseasonably warm day for November and Anna and John were enjoying a pleasant stroll through the park in Ripon. Anna was finally able to do something she had wanted to do for years, place her hand in the crook of John's arm as he led them around a lake in the center of the park. And John was able to do something he had wanted to do for years, place his hand over hers. Of course John was aware that they were still garnering looks from people wondering what a young beautiful woman like Anna was doing with and old cripple like him. He could have cared less though what the strangers thought of him. All that mattered now was that Anna was his and he was free to let the world know it. He spotted a bench down by the lake and led Anna to it, letting her sit first being joining her. He turned to her as he sat.

"Did you enjoy our first proper date?"

Anna smiled up at him, "It was lovely. The tea room was beautiful and that cake was delicious."

John chuckled as he remembered the image of Anna devouring the chocolate cake, then looking up at him as she swallowed the last bite saying she had hoped he hadn't wanted any.

"When we are married, we will have to ask them to send an entire cake over for the reception. Then maybe I shall be able to have a taste of it!" The statement had come naturally to John; after all it was the natural progression to their relationship. With Vera's death he was no longer in need of a divorce and they would be able to be married at the local church.

Anna chuckled at John, "If you're lucky you silly beggar!" She looked at him happiness lighting up her blue eyes, "When can we be married?"

"I think the arrangements can be made in a few months if that is what you want?"

"I would marry you tomorrow if you would let me!"

John took her hand in his, stroking his thumb across her fingers. "I want you to have the wedding of your dreams Anna. You in a white dress, me looking like a fool."

Anna smiled as she imagined John in his wedding suit, his beautiful face lit up as she walked down the aisle. While she did wish it could happen tomorrow, she also loved the thought of her mum and sister being there and Mrs. Hughes and the rest of the staff and of course the Crawley family.

"Will you be speaking to his Lordship about a cottage again?"

John nodded, "I thought I would speak to him tomorrow about it again. I am sure he will be able to find something for us in a few months' time. Will you want to continue your position as head housemaid?"

"I would like too, I would be bored to death alone in the cottage while you worked all day. Of course once we start our family I will be more than busy enough to keep myself occupied."

John smiled at Anna's comment. He was a lucky man. "And how big do you see our family being Miss Smith?"

"Well Mr. Bates." Anna smiled at John's chuckle, "I want a little boy who looks just like you."

John interrupted, "And I want a little girl with your beautiful blue eyes and fair hair."

"Of course we must have one that has your green eyes and my blonde hair."

"Well then we must have one with my brown hair and your blue eyes."

Anna smiled and placed her head on his shoulder. "I think four sounds like a perfectly reasonable number."

John placed a kiss on her head and looked out across the lake. They had their whole future ahead of them. Finally they were exactly where they were meant to be.


	3. A-Z challenge drabbles

Somewhere once he had read the phrase, "You don't know what you have until it is gone," and he remembered laughing at it and commenting to Anna that it was one of those ridiculous statements that he would never understand. After all if you had something good why wouldn't you appreciate it? He had then turned to her and made the comment that he would always appreciate her and everything she was to him. She had offered him her sweet smile and kissed the corner of his mouth before carrying on with the dusting.

Now as he placed a single rose on the raised dirt of her grave he realized the saying was true.

* * *

John's eyes shown with unshed tears as he looked down at the sleeping baby wrapped in the soft white blanket. "Hello my love, I'm your father."

He bent down to kiss her forehead and laughed when her face wrinkled up at the touch. She was perfect, she had ten fingers and ten toes and a little bow of a mouth. Her hair was light brown and her eyes in the few seconds they had opened were blue like Anna's. She had told him that the baby's eyes could change, but John hoped they wouldn't. His favorite color was his wife's eyes and he hoped his daughter's would be the same.

"I can't believe this is real." He looked at Anna his eyes full of love and a smile on his face.

Anna looked up at him, her face full of joy as she regarded father and daughter for the first time. "Believe my love."

* * *

John had finished his portion of the wall quickly, of course half of the paint was on him and not the wall, while Anna's clothes were still paint free. He stood back to admire his work, giving himself a mental pat on the back as he took in the freshly coated wall. He glanced at Anna, who still had half of a wall to paint. He decided to tease her a bit.

"I seem to be done with my half of the wall, shall I finish yours for you?

Anna shook her head. "Being done first doesn't mean it's the better of the two. It's all about finding the right stroke and taking your time to get what you want accomplished."

"Are you saying my wall doesn't look good?"

Anna shook her head, "Not at all, it looks fine, I am just saying when it's done, mine will look better."

John picked up his brush and walked over to the portion of unpainted wall. "How about a little challenge Mrs. Bates? We will each take half of this wall, and whoever does the best job with it doesn't have to do any of the cleanup."

Anna smiled and dipped her brush into the white paint. "You're on Mr. Bates."

An hour later, Anna was sitting back on the settee enjoying the view as John bent over to clean up the mess from their day of painting. She let out a soft chuckle as she heard him muttering about the unfairness of it all.

"Really John if you had taken the time to pay attention you would have seen the fly land on the wall before you painted over it."

John turned to comment when an even better idea went through his head. He walked over to his wife and bent down to kiss her, Anna anticipating the kiss closed her eyes only to frown at the feeling of dampness on her face. She opened them to see John smiling, with paintbrush in hand. She touched the wetness pulling her fingers back to see white paint. She looked at him mouth agape.

"I cannot believe you just did that! It's not my fault you are being a sore loser."

John smiled and reached for her, "I'll show you a sore loser my dear." He ran the brush down the front her dress. Anna gasped and moved her hand down her dress gathering the paint and the proceeded to put it on John's hair, running it down the length of his face. John's eyes widened in shock and he stood up paintbrush in hand. Anna quickly followed and the two found themselves scrambling to reach the nearly empty paint cans. Soon they were both covered in paint and laughing uncontrollably.

Suddenly John pulled her too him and they looked at each other, both slightly out of breath. John slowly ran his hand down Anna's face, cupping her cheek and pulling her face to his. Their mouths touched, softly at first before John's tongue ran across Anna's lower lip seeking an entrance that Anna willingly gave. Sighs and moans quickly followed as they both made quick work of their clothes and sank down onto the settee. In the end Anna was right; it was all about taking your time to get the result you wanted.

* * *

He was lying in bed, silent, the picture of Anna in his hand. The noises of the prison surrounded him, the sound of clanging bars and prisoners screaming, but all he heard was her laugh. He didn't see the dingy grey walls either. All he saw was how she looked the day he placed that golden band on her finger. Instead of lying on an uncomfortable cot, he was stretched out in a king size bed, his wife in his arms.

He was scheduled to hang tomorrow. He had heard them testing the strength of the gallows today; the guards doing a run through to make sure everything went smoothly for the execution. It would be the last night he held her picture to his chest as he closed his eyes, the final time he said her name as he drifted off to sleep.

Despite knowing he would never see her laugh again, or run his hands through her soft tresses or place another kiss on her lips; he would do it all again. Because before he met Anna he hadn't been living anyway.

* * *

**A TALK WITH MRS. HUGHES HAD MADE THE EXTREME CHANGE IN HIS MARRIAGE VERY CLEAR. HE SAT ACROSS FROM HER, HIS MIND GOING IN A MILLION DIFFERENT DIRECTIONS. HE HAD AN OVERWHELMING FEELING OF SADNESS FOR WHAT HAD HAPPENED TO HIS DEAR ANNA AND ALMOST AN EQUALLY OVERWHELMING SENSE OF ANGER AT THE MAN WHO HAD ATTACKED HER. IT WAS ALL SO OBVIOUS NOW AND HE SILENTLY BERATED HIMSELF FOR NOT REALIZING IT SOONER. HE HAD ASSUMED IT WAS ABOUT HIM WHEN THE TRUTH OF THE MATTER WAS HIS WIFE WAS BROKEN AND IN HIS IGNORANCE HE HAD MISSED THE SIGNS. SO MUCH MADE SENSE NOW, THE CUTS ON HER FACE, HOW SHE PULLED AWAY WHEN HE REACHED FOR HER, WHY HE ALWAYS FOUND HER IN THE BOOT ROOM; THAT INFERNAL BOOT ROOM, SHE WAS PUNISHING HERSELF. SHE BLAMED HERSELF FOR WHAT HAPPENED**

**HE SAID SOMETHING TO MRS. HUGHES BUT HE WAS BARELY AWARE OF HER PRESENCE ANYMORE. HE SLOWLY WALKED DOWN THE HALLWAY LOOKING AROUND AND GAVE A SILENT THANK YOU TO FIND HE WAS ALONE. HE CLOSED HIS EYES AND LEANED AGAINST THE WALL AND LET HIMSELF BREAK, BUT ONLY FOR A MOMENT. HE QUICKLY PULLED HIMSELF TOGETHER, THIS WASN'T ABOUT HIM RIGHT NOW. IT WAS ABOUT FINDING ANNA AND TELLING HER SHE WAS NOT TO BLAME. SHE WAS WITHOUT FAULT . HE DIDN'T LET HIMSELF THINK ABOUT WHY SHE HADN'T TOLD HIM OR WHO HAD DONE IT. HE WOULD FIND OUT THOSE ANSWERS LATER. ALL THAT MATTERED NOW WAS HER.**

* * *

He shouldn't have been surprised to hear her speak so frankly about her feelings for him, after all if there was one thing he had learned about Anna Smith it was that she spoke her mind. He didn't understand how it was possible that this beautiful young woman loved him, yet here she was standing before him declaring she did. He wanted to take her in his arms and tell her he loved her too, but he couldn't. Instead he told her a partial truth, that he wasn't free.

The wagon arriving was a blessing in disguise; it prevented him from saying something he had no right to say. As the wagon carried him away from her he thought of all the things that he wished he could have told her. That he did love her; more than he ever thought possible and that his only wish was that he were free to make her his wife. As he watched her get smaller and smaller from his seat, he knew it was best that he had kept silent about his true feelings. He could only offer her friendship.

* * *

Anna had been nervous on their wedding night. She had never been with a man, and she knew Mr. Bates had been with at least one woman. What if she was horrible or didn't know what to do? What if she disappointed him?

Now lying in the big bed, happily wrapped in John's arms, she realized she had been worried for nothing. John had been patient and very generous. He must have sensed how nervous she had been, because he focused on her first, telling her what he was going to do and then showing her exactly what he meant. She had never known she could feel like that. She had heard talk of course, but most of it had involved the women suffering through whatever pleasure the man had decided to take. John was nothing like that though; he knew exactly how and where to touch her and Anna had found herself yelling out as the feelings coursed through her body. Of course they had found their pleasure together as well and even then John had been generous, preparing her for the pain and being gentle with her, at least until she had boldly told him what she wanted and he happily obliged.

As she drifted off to sleep she smiled, if this was what she had to look forward to, she wondered if they would ever leave the bed again.

* * *

Anna surveyed the mess from the door way. She thought there was more flour on the floor and the table than still in the bag, there had obviously been an accident with the eggs, as half of them lay broken in a bowl, shell and all, but the part she found the most hilarious were her husband and daughter both equally messy and both with the same expressions of concentration on their faces as they looked down at her cookbook. She could hear John muttering to himself as he tried to decipher her writing. She slowly entered the kitchen watching out for stray eggs and slabs of butter.

"Well, it looks like you both have been busy while I was away in Ripon."

John quickly turned around, "Anna!" He glanced around the room, wincing at the mess. His wife kept an immaculate kitchen and right now it was anything but that.

Anna walked over to where her husband and daughter were both looking at her and pulled some dried egg off of Abby's curls. "What are you two up too?"

Abby looked at Anna and smiled, "We are building you a cake Mommy. Daddy says chocolate is your favorite."

Anna smiled down at her daughter before turning to her husband, "And Daddy would be right, but tell me how many cakes are you planning to make?"

John looked sheepish as he answered Anna, "Well the first two might have come out a little flat, but I know we can get this one right."

"Are you sure you have enough ingredients left?"

"What do you mean?"

She looked from father to daughter and let out a chuckle, "Well it seems to me that you are wearing more than you actually have left."

John looked down at Anna, a smile on his face, "Oh I think we have plenty, don't you Abby?"

His daughter nodded, her brown curls bouncing. "We do Daddy."

"In fact I think we have too many ingredients, so we should just take a little of this flour and put it right here." He tossed some flour in Anna's hair and down the front of her dress. Abby let out a giggle and clapped her hands.

Anna let out a little gasp, "You did not just do that."

"Oh but I did."

Abby not one to be left out of the fun, reached for some butter and with her little hand wiped a smear on her mother's nose. "I wanna play too!"

Anna let out a chuckle and tapped her daughter on her own butter frosted nose, "I just don't know what I am going to do with the two of you."

John reached down and placed a quick kiss on her lips, "It looks like you are stuck with us; for good and proper."

Anna smiled up at him and then at her daughter; her perfect little family. She was indeed.

* * *

They were in the sitting room of their cottage one night when out of the blue John asked her a question that caught her off guard.

"Anna, what do you see in me?"

Anna looked up from her knitting, surprise on her face. She didn't like the insecurity that she heard in his voice. "That's a very random question, my love."

John frowned a little, looking down at the book he was reading. He should have known it wouldn't _that _easy to ask the question.

"It's nothing really, I just overheard a discussion between two of the new servants today and it made me wonder."

Anna frowned, "And what was this discussion about?"

John shook his head, "Never mind, it doesn't matter. We can just forget I even asked."

Anna stood up and walked over to his chair and placed herself in his lap. John put his book on the side table, and wrapped his arms around her. "We will not forget anything; now tell me what you overheard."

John sighed in resignation. He had hoped to avoid the reason for him asking the question. "They were talking about us, and saying they didn't understand how someone young and pretty like you could be in love with the old valet with a limp."

Anna felt anger course through her, "Who were these ignorant fools?"

John shook his head, "It doesn't matter, and I don't blame them for wondering it. After all it is something I have often asked myself."

Anna shook her head and looking directly in her husband's eyes she placed a hand on his cheek, "I will tell you exactly what I love about you, you silly beggar. I love how your eyes are sometimes green and sometimes brown, but never the same color twice. I love how when you smile, your eyes crinkle in the corners and how most of the time that smile is reserved for me. I love how safe you always make me feel and how every morning you greet me with a kiss and a cup of tea. I love your intellect and how you can discuss anything with anyone and almost always know more than anyone else about the subject. I love that when you feel passionate about something your arms will start flailing about and I have to jump out of the way or else I would lose an eye. And most importantly I love how you love our child."

His eyes widened, "Our child?"

Anna nodded and smiled, "I went to Dr. Clarkson today and I am nearly three months along. You're going to be a father John."

He quickly pulled Anna to him and kissed her softly. He looked at her with tear filled eyes, "I don't understand, how? After all these years?"

Anna let out a chuckle, "Well Mr. Bates if you don't understand how it could happen, I may have to take back what I said about loving your intellect."

John laughed and placed a hand on her still flat stomach, he looked back up at his wife. "I love you, Anna."

Anna reached down and kissed him, "And I love you John Bates, and don't you ever forget it."

* * *

While the situation surrounding them was troubling and uncertain, Anna could not help but feel joyous standing next to John watching as he slipped that golden band on her finger. She looked up at him tears in her eyes and when his face lit up in a smile, his eyes crinkling in the corners, Anna couldn't help the smile that broke across her face either.

She was his wife; it was what she had dreamed about almost from the moment they had met. She didn't know exactly what their future held but she knew that whatever it was they could face it because they were together.

* * *

Anna sat at the servant's hall table and tried to focus on the sewing she had before her, it was nearly impossible though as tears kept blurring her vision. Mr. Bates was leaving today, forced out of job simply because he had a cane. With a sigh she set down the material and thought back to last night when she had brought him a tray of food.

When she had heard him crying, she wasn't sure what to do, she knew he would be embarrassed if he discovered that she had heard him, after all a man had his pride. She didn't want to leave him alone though, so she had called out his name, allowing him a few moments to gather himself.

When he had opened the door she could still tell he had been crying, but she ignored his red swollen eyes and offered a smile instead. There was so much she had wanted to tell him. That she hated that someone so kind and hardworking was leaving, and that with him she had felt something she had never felt before. She didn't quite know what that was, but she knew that when he left he would be taking that part of her with him. She couldn't tell him those things though, so she settled for saying she was sorry and when he said he would be alright, she agreed with him, even though she was worried for him. She didn't know many who would take on a man with a disability.

His kindness had shown through yet again, when he had smiled as she made him promise that he would write her. Anna knew he would too, he was not a man to go back on his word. She had watched him as the door closed and it was only when she had turned away that she let the tears fall.

Anna shook her head and wiped the tears away before resuming her sewing, she had a job to do and as sad as Mr. Bates leaving had made her, she couldn't wallow in self-pity all day. She became so focused on the stitches she was making, every one precise and neatly lined up that she failed to notice the rhythmic thump in the hallway. When she finally did hear it she looked up and saw him standing there.

Her mouth opened in surprise, "Mr. Bates!"

"Hello Anna."

"Does this mean you are staying?"

Mr. Bates nodded, "I am."

She couldn't help the smile that lit up her face. "I'm glad."

He smiled that kind smile of his in return. "So am I."

* * *

He was miserable. The worst moment in his life was when he had forced himself to leave Anna sobbing in the courtyard. He was at fault of course; he shouldn't have made promises without being divorced. He had gotten ahead of himself and become hopeful when he should have been hesitant.

Now he was back in London, with Vera. She had tried to get him back in her bed but he had made it clear, he may be here as her husband but it would be in name only. It was after he had made that statement that she began using her words as weapons. She had just left a few minutes ago but not before once again revealing her irritation, telling him he was useless and nothing but an impotent cripple. It was only after she had taken leave of him that he had reached for the bottle of whiskey in the cupboard. He splashed some into a glass and lifted it up, looking at the brown liquid. It would be a welcome release, to drown out her voice and the feeling of despair he felt living here in his mother's house with her.

It was the memory of Anna that stopped him from drinking it, the hope that someday he would be free of Vera and back at Downton with her again. He pictured Anna in a white dress walking down the church aisle, him waiting at the altar, looking like a fool. He imagined holding her in his arms on their wedding night and holding their children after they had been born. He saw them at their little hotel, sitting in matching chairs on the beach, holding hands and watching their grandchildren play in the sand.

He stood up and poured the contents of the glass into the sink and then followed it with the remaining liquid in the bottle. His loyalties to Anna and what he had promised her were more important than finding solace in the bottle. No, making his dreams a reality would be what got him through this mess, nothing more and nothing less.

* * *

Anna groaned as she stood up and rubbed her lower back. John looked up at her from his chair and frowned.

"Anna? What's wrong?"

Anna shook her head, "I'm fine, I think I just twisted my back a little bit today so it's sore."

John stood up and walked over to her, "Come on let's go upstairs and I'll give you a massage."

A grin crossed her face, "Why Mr. Bates, what are you up too?"

John chuckled, "I swear to you Mrs. Bates, my intentions are perfectly innocent."

Anna winked at him as she headed up the stairs, "Well, let's hope we can change that!"

John followed Anna into the bedroom a smile on his face. He watched as she removed her dress, revealing herself to him in only her chemise. She was beautiful. Sometimes he was still amazed that this woman was his wife. He would never understand how he could have gotten so lucky to be here like this with her. He shook himself out of his reverie and walked over to her, taking her by the hand and leading her to the bed.

Anna laid herself on the bed, laying on her stomach and placing her head on her crossed arms, she felt him get on the bed next to her and he slowly began to work her flesh beneath his hands. It only took a few moments for Anna to moan in appreciation as she became malleable under his firm but tender administrations. John continued to apply pressure and Anna purred in appreciation.

"That feels marvelous."

John reached down to place a kiss on the back of her neck, "I'm glad love."

Anna flipped over and gave John a sultry look, "Is there anything I can massage for you "

John smiled and reached for his wife, "You naughty girl."

She laughed as he kissed her, "And don't you ever forget it."

* * *

There weren't many people in John Bates life who were nice to him. Most people only ever saw his cane. He was prepared for it when he introduced himself to the three women in the hallway. He knew O'Brien wouldn't see past his disability when he saw the way she looked down on him, and even the red-haired housemaid, while not unfriendly seemed unsure about how to react to him. Then the blond haired maid, Anna, had introduced herself and she never even looked at the cane. She just saw him. He could see the friendliness on her face and he knew he would have a friend in her. Yes, it was a nice feeling indeed.

* * *

Everyone kept telling him that things were fine, that Anna was fine, that she just was busy or had a lot on her plate. The truth of the matter though was things were the exact opposite of fine. His wife no longer loved him. She couldn't stand to be around him. It was so bad that she had even moved out of the cottage. He had tried to talk to her, but all she ever seemed to do lately was walk away, which was the opposite of the Anna he knew and loved. She had always stayed. Even when he had told her that he had nothing to offer her, she was there as a friend with love and support, and when he had left with Vera she stayed true to him and found him in that god forsaken pub. Not to mention the weekly visits while he was in prison, always telling him there was no place she would rather be than there with him. She had always been there for him, had always loved him. So now to see Anna always walking away, not wanting to figure things out, it broke his heart.

* * *

By prison mail standards John Bates was a popular man. He received letters from quite a few people. Mrs. Hughes would often write him, as would his lordship. He even occasionally received letters from other staff members like Mrs. Patmore and Daisy and once even a short message from Mr. Carson, letting him know that he would look after Anna until he was able to return. All of those paled in comparison though to the letters from his wife. She wrote him every day, so when the prisoners had their weekly mail call he would be handed a thick pile, most of them written in his wife's soft swirling handwriting. He knew she wrote them in her room, at night after the house was asleep and he always pictured her in his mind. She would be wearing a white nightgown with a soft shawl around her shoulders to keep the chill at bay. Her hair would be down, but pulled back in a soft braid, like the night all those years ago when he had brought her up the tray of food.

He knew he should make the letters last, but he never could. Instead he would read them all at once. Her letters almost always started off the same way, by telling him how much she loved him, and she would talk about the things they would do when he was released. Then she would tell him the latest gossip from the house and about her duties as ladies maid to the girls. Sometimes her letters would then turn more poignant, and she would talk about how she missed his arms around her at night while she was sleeping and seeing his smile greet her in the servants' hall in the morning. They always ended on a positive note though with Anna swearing that she would never give up and that she would find the proof to set him free. Sometimes after reading the letters, the guilt would overwhelm him and he would curse himself for putting Anna in this position, the wife of a convicted murderer.

Despite the guilt he felt, the truth of the matter was that the letters always brought him joy, because they were from her and it was like a piece of Anna was always with him when he read them. Her letters were what kept him going in this damp and vile place. When he was reading them, everything was full of light and the shadows were chased away.

Then suddenly the letters stopped and it was dark once again.

* * *

For John, being married to Anna was the most wonderful thing in the world. He loved everything about it, from waking up next to her every morning, to reading together in the sitting room at night. He loved their talks over morning tea, and making love whenever the mood struck them. He loved watching her make a pie and dust the mantle. He had noticed however in their time together in the cottage that his wife had several peculiar quirks. She would brush her hair exactly 100 times, no more no less. He would watch her from his side of the bed as she did it, her lips softly counting the strokes. He once asked what would happen to her hair if she brushed it 101 times and she had just pursed her lips and gave him "the look" so he stopped teasing her. He also noticed how she would stir her tea precisely three times and then tap the spoon twice. She did this every single time they had tea, however he had learned from the hair brushing incident so he didn't question her about the tea. One quirk he particularly loved was how she would giggle after they made love. It was a joyous sound and music to his ears. The first time she had done it he had asked if she was alright, afraid that she might have been embarrassed about her very enthusiastic reaction to his ministrations, but Anna had ensured him, she wasn't embarrassed at all, she was full of joy afterwards and she couldn't help but giggle when it was over. The quirk he loves the most was how much she loved him. He would never fully understand it, but he embraced it because nothing made him happier than having her love.

* * *

Anna was surprised when she opened the door to the cottage and saw John waiting for her. She placed her hand on her chest and let out a gasp.

"John, you scared me. I thought you would still be in Ripon."

John smiled as he bent down to place a kiss on her lips, "Sorry love, I finished up earlier than expected and I brought home a surprise."

Anna smiled, "A surprise?"

John nodded and reached for her hand, "Close your eyes and I will lead you into the sitting room."

Anna closed her eyes, "I feel silly. Why do my eyes have to be closed?"

"If they aren't closed, it will ruin the surprise, just trust me." John led Anna into the sitting room where he placed her in front of their side table.

"Okay, open your eyes."

Anna opened them and they widened in wonderment at the small radio that was on the table. She looked up at John the surprise evident in her voice.

"You bought a radio?"

John nodded, "You love listening to the one at Downton so much, and I wanted you to be able to hear the music when you were at home as well."

Anna reached out and ran a finger down the wooden box, "It must have been expensive. I thought we agreed that we were saving for our future?" Anna rubbed her stomach, where the baby was barely noticeable.

John nodded, "I know, and we are, but I thought we deserved this one splurge. I promise, no more purchases without discussing it with you first."

Anna smiled, "Shall we turn it on?"

John reached down and turned on the radio filling their sitting room with the sound of music. John placed his cane on the settee and reached out his hand. "May I have the honor of having your first dance of the evening?"

Anna chuckled, "I believe you told me years ago that you didn't dance Mr. Bates?."

"I think I can manage, as long as you will always be my partner."

Anna smiled up at him, "My dance card will always be filled with your name."

John wrapped his arm around her back and pulled her against him, Anna came to him easily, placing one hand around his neck and the other in his free hand. He moved her slowly around, mindful of his knee. Anna giggled as John dipped her down, bringing her back up and kissing her on the lips.

"So do you like your surprise?

Anna nodded, "It's wonderful, but I love dancing with you even more."

They spent the rest of the evening dancing around their sitting room, and John's knee definitely protested the next day, but it had been worth it to see his wife so happy.

* * *

John watched as Anna skipped ahead to get their ice cream. He couldn't help think about the past year and all the trials and tribulations they had gone through. A few months ago John had thought his marriage was over, only to learn the horrible truth that his wife had been attacked. He knew she was keeping the name of the perpetrator from him, and he understood why she did it. She was afraid of losing him, and after seeing him in jail once before, he didn't blame her for feeling that way.

He was keeping a secret from Anna as well. He had thought about killing Green, had even imagined how it could be done without being caught. He had even bought the ticket and traveled to London, but he couldn't make himself leave the train station once he got there, couldn't risk the life he and Anna had built for each other. The truth was there was no perfect crime, and even though the man deserved to die, John couldn't risk being caught and losing the life he had with Anna. So he had turned back around and returned to Downton and to his wife.

And in the end, Green had gotten his comeuppance, and he and Anna were in a good place. Of course there were good days and bad days, but they were surviving because they had each other, and that would never change. He watched as she ran back to him, her hands full of ice cream and a broad smile on her face. Yes, they would definitely survive this, after all didn't they say love conquered all?

* * *

Anna watched as the handcuffs slid over his wrists and knew she was being tested, she had married him knowing things were uncertain. Now it was time to face those uncertainties. She looked at him as he turned to her with a whispered, "I love you," and she put every ounce of love she had for him into her words and a final kiss. He was torn from her too quickly and she watched as he was led away. She saw his pronounced limp and the anger jolted through her towards the men who had forced him to walk without his cane.

She continued to watch him until he was led out the door her lips quivering with emotion, tears threatening to spill onto her pale cheeks. She glanced at the servants who lined the hallway, shock written on all of the faces. Mr. Carson spoke first, saying he would need to find his lordship immediately. Mrs. Hughes glanced at him before she walked over to Anna and led her away from the group into her sitting room.

It was only then that Anna allowed herself to break down, comforted by the older woman's embrace. She pulled herself together quickly though and replied to Mrs. Hughes unanswered question. "Yes, he is my husband. We were married yesterday in Ripon."

The tears threatened to fall again as she pictured their wedding and their wedding night, and all the talk of the future and its promise, only to have it all taken from her in a moment's time.

"Anna, you have had quite the shock, I think everyone would understand if you took some time off to deal with everything that has happened.

She looked at Mrs. Hughes and shook her head.

"This is a test of my strength and devotion Mrs. Hughes, and I will be fine. I know my husband is innocent and I will do everything in my power to free him."

Anna looked at the head housekeeper one last time before leaving the room to head upstairs. She knew she would have to answer a lot of questions, and that was fine, they would all come back to the same answer. Her name was Mrs. John Bates and she would do whatever it took to make sure her husband was back in his home and her arms again.

* * *

Anna frowned as she got off the bus in Kirkbymoorside. John wasn't in his usual place on the bench in the park. Anna had been coming here on her half day for weeks, since she had discovered him working in the Red Lion. John had been hesitant at first, saying he didn't want Anna's reputation to be sullied, but Anna was quick to point out that no one here knew he was married or who they were, and here they could be what they weren't allowed to be at Downton, a couple in love and courting. It had been impossible for John to argue with her after that and it was quickly decided she would visit whenever she had the opportunity. They had decided the safest explanation was to tell everyone that Anna was visiting a close family friend who had just moved here. Neither was particularly happy about lying to everyone, but they knew it was for the best. John wasn't ready to come back to Downton, and Anna wasn't willing to stay away until he did.

Anna walked to the pub and went in, frowning when she didn't see John anywhere. She spotted a familiar figure though, his boss. She walked over to him.

"Hello Mr. Evans, I was hoping you could tell me where Mr. Bates is?"

Mr. Evans seemed surprised to see Anna. "Miss Smith! Mr. Bates sent word this morning that he was sick with the flu, he also asked me to send a wire, stopping you from coming today."

Anna shook her head, "I never received a wire, not that I would have listened if I had. Will you please direct me towards John's living quarters?"

Mr. Evans seemed shocked at the request, but Anna was persuasive and within a few minutes she had the address in hand and was heading towards the boarding house. She quickly found the room she was looking for and knocked gently, before opening the door.

Anna didn't spend much time looking around the room, instead she focused on the small bed in the corner. John appeared to be sleeping, but from the look of the bed sheets it wasn't very peaceful. She quickly walked over and touched a hand to his cheek. He was burning up with fever. She looked around and saw a pitcher of water on a small table, she walked over to retrieve it, it was obviously not from today, but would have to do for the moment. She reached into her bag for a handkerchief and soaked it, walking back over to apply the wet cloth to John's face.

John shook his head as the cool liquid touched his face and he slowly opened his eyes. His eyes took a moment to focus but once they did they widened when they saw Anna.

"Anna? Surely I'm dreaming?"

Anna smiled down at him as she wiped his face with the cloth, "You aren't dreaming, I'm really here my love."

John frowned, and started to speak, but was overtaken with a coughing fit. When it passed he spoke up, "I sent word to you that you should stay at Downton today."

"I never got it, and even if I had do you think I would have listened?"

John smiled softly, "Probably not. How did you find me?"

Anna smiled, "I was worried when you weren't in your usual spot, so I went to the pub and talked to Mr. Evans. Once I knew the situation, I sent a wire from the post office to Mrs. Hughes, explaining that my "friend" was very ill, and I might not be back tonight because I was taking care of her."

John frowned, "You mean to stay here? No Anna, that wouldn't be proper."

"Do you admit that you need someone to help you?"

"Perhaps, but I wouldn't want anyway to get the wrong idea about you—about us."

Anna smiled, "No one will but if it makes you feel better if anyone discovers me here I will tell them I am your sister."

John shook his head, he wanted to protest, but he didn't have the energy and Anna was right, he did need help, he barely had the strength to open his eyes much less take care of himself.

He looked at Anna, "You win this one, Miss Smith. I just hope you don't regret your decision."

Anna shook her head and pulled back the covers, "There is nothing I regret when it comes to loving you, now do you think with my help you will be able to move over to the chair while I change your linens?"

John nodded but before sitting up, he reached for Anna's hand, grabbing it and squeezing it gently.

"Thank you."

Anna reached down and kissed his forehead. "I love your Mr. Bates and there is no place I would rather be than here with you."

* * *

John Bates did not wear his heart on his sleeve and he didn't reveal much about how he was feeling at any given time. Anna worked hard to see a smile, or a special glance or if she as lucky a touch and when they happened she felt victorious. She remembered the smile when they were in the servants' hall, when he had declared that they were 'alone at last'; and when he had brought her the tray and had offered her his sweet smile and looked at her with such care. Of course her favorite moment was also her most frustrating one. The moment in the courtyard when he had taken her hand and leaned in to kiss her, Anna's heart had been pounding so hard in her chest she was sure he could hear it and she had closed her eyes and parted her lips in anticipation of finally receiving his kiss, only to jump back at the unexpected sound from behind her. She had felt overwhelmed by her feelings at that moment, and had run away, wishing the entire time she had turned around and gone back.

Now here she was standing before him again, hoping for another one of those moments. "Will you miss me?"

And she got what she hoped for, another one of his smiles, and amusement in his eyes at her question. Of course he uttered another one of his noble statements, but Anna just smiled to herself as he walked away. She knew he loved her, all her victories told her that.

* * *

John and Anna looked around the lobby of the small hotel. It was in obvious disrepair, but it had been successful at one point, it was only when the owners had refused to modernize that it had closed when people started staying at the more modern hotels in the area. John looked at Anna.

"What do you think?"

Anna smiled up at him, "I think with a little work and love this place could be great. The name is weird though."

John nodded, "Yes the name will have to be changed."

"Xenia is such a strange name."

"Well the current owners may be Greek, as Xenia is the ancient Greek concept of hospitality.* I'm not sure it works for the name of a hotel though."

"It feels like we would be stealing it, the price is so low. Do you think we can make it successful?"

John looked around the lobby once again, and pictured it repaired and up to date. They had looked at a few other places, and while they had been nice, they hadn't been happy with the design of them. This one presented the opportunity to almost build their own and make it exactly as they wanted it.

John nodded, "I think so. It's in a great location, right near the sea. All the other hotels in the area are further away. I think with modernization, it can be successful again. It might take a few years to see a profit, but I do think we can get there. There is plenty of property, which means we can build a nice cottage to live in instead of living in the hotel."

Anna reached for John's hand, smiling up at him as she did so. "We could definitely use the extra room." She rubbed her belly and John smiled down at her. Yes, this was the perfect place to start their family.

*thanks wikipedia for the definition

* * *

John was walking home after work when he heard a strange noise come from behind a shed. He stopped to listen, frowning as he heard the yowl again. He slowly walked behind the shed, holding his cane out in front of him in case he confronted a wild animal. However he put it down when he saw what was making the noise. He slowly walked over to the woodpile reaching down for the trapped animal.

Anna was in the kitchen, getting ready to make dinner for the family when she heard the front door open. She waited a few moments for John to come into the kitchen, but when he didn't appear she frowned and walked out to the small entrance way, her eyes widening at what she saw. John appeared to be holding a small kitten.

"You brought home a kitten?"

John looked up at Anna then back down at the small kitten wrapped in his jacket, "I heard her yowling when I was walking home. She was trapped between some wood. She has a cut on her leg, I don't think it's bad, but I just couldn't leave her there."

"Well bring it into the sitting room; let's hope the children don't see it—-"Anna was cut off by a child squealing in delight.

"Daddy you brought home a kitten!"

Anna and John looked at each other and smiled. It looked like they would be adding to their family.

* * *

John had learned throughout the years that Anna didn't do anything half way. She was very zealous in so many aspects of her life.

John first realized this when she fell in love with him. She wasn't the type to constantly mention how much she loved him in those early days, instead she was his truest friend and biggest supporter when others tried to bring him down. She was there with a smile or a soft touch when he needed it and her friendship and love quickly became the most important things in his life. She was the person John knew he couldn't live without.

Of course it was her strength and determination that found him in that pub after he had left her crying in the courtyard all those months earlier. She sat across from him so brave and determined and offered to be his mistress and live in sin with him. John had thought about it for a moment, but quickly realized that he didn't want that life for her. He wanted her as his true wife, it was what she was meant to be.

It was also her convictions that led her to tell him in the hallway of Downton that they would be married, and John realized once again he was powerless against her resolve. So he had booked the register and had found himself standing beside her saying his vows as he slipped the gold band onto her left ring finger. The moment she had been pronounced his wife was the happiest moment of his life.

One of the few times he had been surprised at her zealous was in the bedroom on their wedding night. Her passion had been a revelation to him. As he kissed her body and used his mouth in all the right places he was excited by her moans and her screams as she reached her peak. Afterwards she had giggled and turned red, embarrassed by her enthusiasm but John had kissed her and told her to never be ashamed of being so passionate, that it was one of the things he loved most about her.

Of course, Anna had been her most zealous in freeing him from prison. She had single-handedly been responsible for finding the evidence to clear his name and release him. She had doggedly poured over letters and visited Vera's friends and neighbors, looking for any clue that might set him free. She had been there on every one of her half-days, giving him hope when the darkness threatened to overwhelm him. He knew that without her he would still be in that dark and damp hell, the life slowly draining out of him. He may have thanked god and her, but he knew that it was her and her alone that had set him free from that prison.

And he was witness to that zealousness again as she placed his hand on her stomach and looked at him with a wide smile on her face. When the realization broke across his face, she let out a laugh and threw her arms around him holding him tightly before passionately kissing his lips. She had led them to the bedroom soon after, quickly removing her clothes and his in her eagerness to make love.

And now as he walked into the bedroom of their cottage he was overwhelmed as he saw his wife holding their newborn daughter. She had used every ounce of strength she had to bring their child into this world. As he walked over to the bed to kiss his wife and meet his daughter for the first time, it had never been clearer to him how amazing his wife truly was. Her knew it would be Anna's zealous for life that guided their daughter in hers and there was nothing greater than that in the world. As he looked down at his family with tears in his eyes he realized that he wouldn't have had it any other way. After all it was that zealousness that had led him to this moment here with the loves of his life.


End file.
